dream
This is a short reflection of a dream I had about 6 years ago, a dream that is still the most vivid & emotionally moving dream I've had to this day.
We were all there, just waiting out these final moments.
Waiting for our time together to cease.
There were seven, or eight of us. It’s hard to remember these details once we had passed through.
But we had spent eons together, wandering over this world, meandering around, obtaining knowledge, piggybacking off experiences and phenomena, learning so much about this strange landscape.
And the whole time the surface that rested below us was a potent reminder of how easily we could all fall into nonexistence.
It was always there, no matter where we travelled on this planet. It was on the mountains, it was covering the oceans, it was covering the plains. Any contact and we would be absorbed into...whatever it was.
We knew we’d have to go in there eventually. Once our abilities ran out and there was no more we could attain, we would start to sink. We’d stop hovering above the surface and get drawn into the inky, murky, swirly curtain that was draped over everything we knew. Like a balloon weighed down by a stone, we would end up unable to stay above.
So we had gathered together before the tiny stone gave us no choice. Before we would be forced into the carpet of mortality, the oil spill of endings, the endless not-quite-black, we would be masters of our own destiny. We felt more grateful than many of the others. To have all seven of us (or was it nine?) be able to experience this purpose at roughly the same time, there was a special connection that we treasured.
I looked (or whatever the equivalent of looking was) around at my peers. There was that familiar pulsing of pure emotion whenever we interacted with each other, but it felt stronger and more overwhelming this time, to the point where you couldn’t ignore it any longer. It was impossible to escape it, or to focus on anything else. The pulsing was reciprocated, of course. Because we knew this would be the last time we’d all be together, at least in our current forms. None of us wanted to accept our fate; being drawn into the oily surface where we would lose our camaraderie. So to delay the inevitable, we forced the emotion onto each other. That feeling of immense joy, counterweighted by the sorrow that our time together had come to a close.
We didn’t bother bringing up past experiences. We didn’t bother trying to invoke nostalgia to savour the moment. There was no need. We had all gone through several eternities together. We had seen others complete their purpose and fall into the murk, and we had seen new beings appear – always from nowhere, noone ever knew from where or what caused them to exist – and go through the same motions we did. And yet, there we were. Simply holding on to the final moment and just existing there, together, for one last time before we departed forever.
I don’t remember who fell into the surface first, but once it started happening, the pain from every subsequent passing was a little bit easier. In the end, it was the red one, the yellow one, and I who remained. The thought materialised that I never knew what colour I was known as – we were never able to communicate our own interpretations of what we saw, for some reason.
So when there was only the three of us remaining, there was an unspoken (unfelt?) agreement to sink into the surface together. And after one final pulse of emotion – not the strong, arresting blast like before, but a more measured response to give the moment some respect and dignity – we went in.
And for the first and only time, we would touch the surface.